2. Bed Sores (or, more specifically, couch sores): Some get injured in an instant when they tumble end over end with their feet strapped into a snowboard. Other injuries come on more slowly and are incurred from sitting for long stretches with your feet propped up on an ottoman.
3. Emotional Anguish brought on by Sentimental Advertisements: Especially those featuring real athletes with actual photos or even video footage of them as adorable children.
4. Empathetic Performance Anxiety: Viewing stress, which is already high, can hit unhealthy limits when the commentators reference concepts such as, “redemption,” “expectation,” “weight of the whole country on his/her shoulders,” and “this is his/her last performance/race before retiring.”
5. Multifaceted Confusion including but limited to: 1. The rules 2. The techniques required to master these unnatural feats 3. Improbability of survival through almost any of these events.
6. Extreme Fatigue: Staying up so late for two weeks straight while trying to hold down a job can make you feel exhausted as a cross country skier after crossing the finish line.
7. Vision Impairment, not to mention Compromised Appearance : Staring at the television screen this long can make vision blurry and cause Olympic size rings to develop under your eyes.
To read the article I wrote for Slate Magazine four years ago about actually training for the Olympics (sort of) and falling short, click here.
Truth be told, though I do consider it an endurance event, I love watching the Olympics. Have the they harmed (or helped?) you in any way? Happy Viewing!