When I was in college, I dreamed I would one day have a newspaper column. And then, POOF!* It happened!

*POOF in this case does not indicate a magical or instantaneous occurrence. In fact, we’re talking more like 23 ish years of riding a writing roller coaster, complete with highs and lows and lots of loops. Along the way, I’ve written fiction and non-fiction. I’ve composed essays, post modern dream sequences, farcical poetry, humorous bullet-points, and several award-worthy grocery and To-Do lists. I’ve written journal entries and freelance articles. I’ve created brochures and radio ads for advertising agencies. I’ve written a collection of short stories and an unpublished sports memoir revised approximately 35 times over the course of 10 years. I published a book of fake advice for homeowners. As many of you know, I’ve written blog post after blog post on a plethora of subjects. Long before any of this, I wrote a little oval shaped book (laminated by my crafty mom) about a thumb (featuring the small thumb print of yours truly). With my first erasable pen, I penned (and also erased) words about a colony of friendly giants. The point is that I have by now done a good deal of writing in conventional, unconventional, virtual, and print venues. I’ve made money at this gig and I’ve lost a lot more. I have been rejected by editors and I have done celebratory “I’ve been accepted!” pajama dances in my living room. I have been applauded at readings. I’ve asked my friends to read and comment and share my work and you have, so thank you for that. I have cried, torn my hair out, and quit this weird, often uphill pursuit more times than I want to admit. And then, I have always eventually gotten an idea, found my pen or my pencil or my laptop and…written something new. I guess this is what I do.

This is my long and wordy way of announcing “something new”: a humor column at the wonderful Nyack News & Views:

THE CHRONICLES OF PARENTING

There isn’t an official tag line to this endeavor, but here are some unofficial ones:

• It comes out every other Thursday.
• The topic (parenting) is something I am currently quite invested in. I love opportunities to pretend I’m an expert.
• I have a excellent editor named Dave Zornow. It is a pleasure to work with someone supportive and hilarious.
• I got to do a photo shoot (see above) at a playground. This helped to fulfill my other longstanding dream of being a supermodel, minus the super and minus the model.

So far, I’ve written about the dangers for parents at playgrounds.

…Needing industrial-grade equipment to feed your kid.

…The challenges of packing for a trip when you have a toddler underfoot.

…And the latest is a diagnostic tool to determine if you, too, might have an affliction called Extremely Tired Parent Syndrome.

If you haven’t done so already, I invite you to take a look. If you find yourself entertained in any way and feel inspired to share this column on your social media, you have my permission (aka my pleading pleading pleading) to do so. Seriously, THANK YOU for reading and THANK YOU to the friends and family who have been encouraging all my word experiments over the years…

Don’t forget to follow along on FACEBOOK and TWITTER. Cheers!