life

on the fence

Let me share with you a frightening formula: corner lot + busy street + toddler who is clearly going to be an Olympic sprinter (as long as races are held on a zigzagged track) + no fence = fretful nights where sleeping is replaced by nail biting and days are […]

note to the babysitter re: gnomes

Dear Babysitter, Hello! Thanks for coming a bit earlier today so that I could attempt to call the dentist, the pediatrician, the gynecologist and the car dealership before work without a toddler hugging my knees and repeating “readyreadyready” 1,453 times with extreme urgency and a complete lack of specificity. (Ready […]

bubble calendar

All I have to say is…………….POP! 365 days per year. Could there be anything more satisfying than an XL calendar composed of bubble wrap? What a way to mark time. This Bubble Calendar poster is designed and made in Brooklyn. We love the way it looks in our library. Thank […]

7 ways these Olympics might hurt you

1. Painful fits of Jealousy, specifically of the: Athletic prowess, 2. Hot, young, strong bodies, 3. Gold medals (or, really, medals of any color), 4. Corporate endorsement 2. Bed Sores (or, more specifically, couch sores): Some get injured in an instant when they tumble end over end with their feet […]

falloween 2013

Some crazy things are going on at home tome headquarters this Falloween. For one thing, our decorative grass, above, has turned a pleasing shade of brown and sprouted fancy, fall-ish tufts. Six friendly ghosts are calling our pergola home… Boo! After several years of searching/hoping for/dreaming about weird white mutant […]

a thank you note to our lawn

Hey there! Just wanted to thank you for being so understanding when all those trucks, several workmen, and a back hoe recently tore you to shreds. It must have been a shock to experience such a violent upheaval – if you were confused, just know that we were too. We […]

gnome news: an interview

It has recently come to our attention that a “local parent” has been foisting her inexplicable fascination with garden gnomes onto her young son. Because we are hard-hitting journalists specializing in breaking news of a…gnomey nature, we decided to go straight to the source — we are proud to announce […]

minimalism no more

WARNING: The following post could be upsetting to individuals who adhere to a minimalistic lifestyle; it could be disturbing to people who prefer their living spaces to be clean and uncluttered; and it could potentially unhinge those who seek solace and serenity in their homes. ANOTHER WARNING: The following post […]

how to reason with a stink bug

In case you ever have an infestation* of stink bugs,** allow me to share some hard-earned wisdom with you. * Infestation consists of at least one sighting. ** Stink bugs, a.k.a Pentatomidae, are shaped like a shield and apparently emit a smell of rancid almonds if disturbed/squashed/or in any way […]